Oh My Freakin God! I made good coffee!

I suprised myself! Seriously, I was completely convinced that I was a total retard with regards to making coffee.

Actually, I'm officially a coffee geek, nerd or goober, because I read about 10 articles and actually watched a youtube video of this guy making french press coffee set to sinister and then sleezy music. The music will make you laugh and the guy is funny the way he
gives a cheese grin when the coffee is done. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9InULN_Jfnc

Anyway, I went out with friends last night to this place called Fogo de Chao in Philadelphia for my best friend's birthday celebration (more on this later - that place was an orgasmic dream land of food) and when I was explaining to a new found friend how I am experiencing a serious delay in my ability to make coffee, he laughed and said "What the f*!  It's like a 2 to 1 ratio, you pour in the water, press the button, ya got coffee! What's so hard about it?" I laughed too, my response being "I don't what the f my problem is. But I'm gonna keep trying until I burn my damn microwave out from boiling water!"

Oh what fun we had at my expense. I even got some responses to facebook status updates about my coffee making issues. One dear friend said "It's pretty simple. How do you screw it up? Can you show video on how you're making it? I'm perplexed."

So, this morning, I set out to prove to all of my friends by video that I have great screw up talent (see videos below). I ground up about 8 Tbsp of beans, set the grind to course setting and the 8 cup setting in my Coffee-Mate coffee grinder which I really like better than one I used to have because you can remove the chamber to pour out the grounds and wash more easily: Mr. Coffee IDS77 Electric Coffee Grinder with Chamber Maid Cleaning System, Black Then, I brought 18oz of water, via a Pyrex glass in the microwave, to exactly 199 degrees (about 4-5 minutes). I poured the almost boiling water over my freshly ground coffee in the french press, stirred the coffee (I didn't stir as much as I did yesterday - maybe 15 seconds of stirring this time), covered with the lid while leave the plunger up and let it steep 4 minutes. But I had to remove the stupid banana from the background of my video and get out my cream and sugar, so really, it steeped about 4.5 minutes. I poured, made a disgusting gulping noise on my video and was prepared to claim to the world that no matter how well I followed instructions, my coffee would taste like worm turds.

Very suprisingly, after a sip and loud swallow (real attractive), I had to admit that it actually tasted alright. It has a tang to it that is probably derived from the type of bean I used and from not filtering the coffee oils as is normally caught in the paper filter of drip coffee makers. Now, french press coffee is supposed to be more superior than drip coffee. I don't know, maybe I'm not used to coffee in its superior form. Maybe I'm accustomed to enjoying flat gasoline flavored swill. In fact, I love Burger King coffee because of that automotive shop taste. It is the only coffee that I like without cream and sugar. So, if most people hate BK coffee, then really, I am just a total freak of nature with bass ackwards taste buds. As for french press coffee, I'm only about 80% in love with it. There is also very distintive burnt bark undertone to the flavor. Most coffee has a subtle woody flavor, but this one is definitely more pronounced. It's not a bad flavor, just different.

However, the really good news is that my coffee was not gray, it actually had a caramel color to it. I also did not cough, gag or choke on what usually tastes like charcoal. I'm sitting here, typing this and enjoying my french press coffee, and I made it. Yes, me, the one who can cook, bake and then send guests running home with diarrhea after an overzealous use of coffee grounds. So, woohoo for me!! I did it! And I will post video to prove it! Now, I can go forth and shop and try various types of coffee beans, confidant in my ability to extract their flavor - properly. :)

Next type off coffee to master: automatic drip, espresso and cappucino.

With Love,
Michelle

P.S. My french press video (3 parts) - my apologies, I think my voice is very quiet.
Part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QfzNfojhP4
Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nRNdgocl7k
Part 3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fr8eV25RGPM